Tips When You Are Unsure About A Relationship

Uncertainty is certain in our lives so in relationships as we cannot control someone's heart and because of this there is always a certain amount of uncertainty in relationships.

The fear of the unknown causes many of us to put up walls and push others away. Many people shut down completely instead of facing why they are unsure about a relationship. And the reason for this is the need for certainty, as it is a survival mechanism, and when in such uncertain states we tend to do what is most necessary to protect our hearts and ourselves. But we need to learn how to deal with uncertainty in relationships as it will help us to grow and evolve spiritually and it is here where we can find joy and happiness.

Uncertainty in a relationship is caused by fear, both rational and irrational fear. It may happen that you are fearful to be vulnerable or to get hurt or abandoned in the long run.

Identify your fears and share them with your partner:

What do you do to protect yourself from getting hurt or feeling the pain? Do you just hold back your feelings? or do you give a cold shoulder to your partner when you are unsure about a relationship. Instead of acknowledging it with proper understanding we often engage in unhealthy behaviors.

The first thing you need to do when you are unsure about a relationship is to identify your fears, recognize what triggers you and the patterns that make you feel the way you are feeling and then share it with your partner. Sharing this information with your partner can help them to play a supportive role in helping you work with your fears and find a new way where you can deal with any such destructive pattern. Communicating properly and openly with your partner can really help a lot.

Learn to give without expecting anything in return:

You live more when you learn to give without expecting anything in return. Try to know more about your partner as what they are chasing in life, their life goals, their pains, and fears. Don't be in a relationship just because to receive, learn to receive joy from seeing your partner fulfilled. Give your love and honesty to your partner. And love the person for who they are and not for who you want them to be. Accepting them as they are will allow them to open up more and connect with you on a deeper level.

Trust:

Though it may be the hardest thing to do when you are unsure about a relationship learn to choose trust over anything. When you are unsure about a relationship all you want is maybe to run away but stay. Learn to believe in your partner and it is a key to handling uncertainty in a relationship. Rather than reacting to any situation too quickly learn to observe and then process it.

Choose understanding over punishment:

If you apply silent treatment, accusation, or withholding of affection just to punish them to show how their actions have hurt you in order to hurt your partner in return it may not work. Rather it will end up pushing the other person further and creating mistrust. So the solution is not to punish when you are hurt but rather to understand how to deal with uncertainty in a relationship by practicing acceptance and love. When you show your partner that you still love them and want to understand their actions it will make the bond stronger and the intimacy deeper.

Put yourself in your partner’s shoes:

Treat them as you want to be treated. It even means teaching by showing. When your partner is going through any pain or suffering be present and be compassionate. By doing all this you will be able to stay connected and find a deeper meaning in your relationship.

Live in the moment:

You can change your past nor can control your future. Don’t let your fear take over your relationship. Try to live in the moment, enjoy the moment. Don’t worry about what the future has to bring, when you are unsure about a relationship be sure to live in the present moment.

The only thing that you can control is your actions, behaviors, reaction and the choices you make in your relationship. So instead of running away or shutting down completely apply these tips, it will help you to see your situation in a better way.